This week, I've learned (yet again) that relationships are sticky. They're messy and difficult, but I have hope that with hard work, like any good thing, they will be fruitful. Through the sowing of many tears and the process of burying my will to take up God's will for me, I trust that He will in turn take my hurt and do something beautiful with it. I trust Him, because of His faithfulness. So, I'm sitting here, supposedly taking my final, with swollen eyes from the tears that pour endlessly from my face, and I'm writing this from a heart that is really hurting, but I take comfort in knowing that this life isn't about me and what I accomplish, but that this life is for and about Jesus. He has conquered this world for me -- in His death -- and I can stand victorious with Him -- because of His Resurrection -- that brings me hope. And hope is all I have. Hope is the one thing that can never be taken from me, and the current source of my joy -- even through pain. While taking my final, I found myself singing (without even thinking about it) a hymn. I thought I'd include the lyrics...
When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot,
Thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.
Though Satan should buffet,
though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul
Christ has regarded my helpless estate and has shed His own blood for my soul. Because of that, I can say that it is well with me. Okay I have five mins until I have to turn in my final. Yikes! So long <3
Kelly,
ReplyDeleteI couldn’t have put how I’m feeling right now any better then you just did. I don’t know what Gods plan is but I know that if we both push completely into Him and let Him do with us and our hearts what is according to His will and His plan for us that we will be fruitful. It’s times like this (well kinda like this because I’ve never been through something completely like this) that I like to remind myself not to put God in a box and try to figure out what He’s thinking or planning because the truth is that I am a retch and I have no clue how the most amazing, beautiful, graceful, all knowing, creator of this world and all in it, thinks or how He plans to carry out His will. So, I will trust in Him fully, I will let Him guild my every step, I will willingly and joyfully be a tool from Him to use to fulfill Him plan and, I will let Him turn me into the man he has planed for me to be! Thinking of you often, praying for you constantly, with love, Caleb.
Wow, I just read my comment and lots of spelling/grammar errors…oh well! :b
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